Summer Solstice
As I sit outside this evening and listen to the birds and the out of the ordinary silence, it takes me back 3 years ago, just a few weeks before having my son. For those of you that know me, you'll recall the story of how the birth of our son went from one end of the spectrum to the other...and every which way in between. You may also remember how we were stuck in the hospital for 7 full days following his birth, or, I was.
I remember the Summer Solstice, the first day of summer, June 21st of 2014 like it was yesterday. It was a beautifully warm evening, I was nestled in a small, but private, hospital room with our new son and my husband. Our window was open, the birds sang away all day and into the evening, and the hospital just seemed quieter than usual. It was a Saturday that year. As a new mother, brand new, I was extra emotional, frustrated from the situation we were in, and exhausted. My husband being the saint he is, was playing old Saturday Night Live skits with John Candy to make me laugh and distract me from the reality of what was: not being allowed to leave the hospital.
As I scrolled through Facebook and Instagram I saw countless posts of special yoga events to celebrate summer solstice; photos of friends attending live music parties on the beaches of Toronto and numerous other posts of what seemed like my old life, and what used to be my freedom.
I get an anxious feeling in my tummy when I go back to that feeling. Why was I in my situation? Why hadn't I witnessed my son's birth? I was the one who carried and birthed him! Why had my blood pressure risen so high I wasn't allowed to leave the hospital? And why, had I lost my freedom?
Freedom is a funny word. We all want it, yet, we don't want TOO much of it. It can be inconsistent, scary, but also invigorating and beautiful. Becoming a mother changes your freedom. It takes it away but also creates space in your life for new and amazing things and experiences. I wouldn't change a thing with how things went down in June of 2014. That week in the hospital may have been the most difficult week of my life yet, also the best. Our new family, all 3 of us, roomed in that tiny space for 7 full days. My husband didn't leave, my son was only there with us for 4 as he was in NICU for 3 of those days...but I still feel grateful. We had our chance to nest in together...we learned how strong we were, and no matter how much you pray to God, or higher beings or your guardian angels, there is still always a plan that has your best interests in mind.
This year on Summer Solstice I am hosting a Yoga Celebration at my place of employment: Station Gallery in Whitby. As I listen to these birds and this silence this evening on our deck in the backyard of our Suburban home, I am reminded of how everything comes full circle. Everything you dream of can and will happen. The things you truly want in your life will come...you just have to relax into what is, follow through on your intentions by putting them into action even with baby steps, and open yourself up to receive all of the blessings and amazing magical miracles that will come your way.
For more information on my Summer Solstice Yoga Celebration at Station Gallery, please visit our website to buy your ticket or to purchase a membership and come for free!
